My good can opener broke today. See, if I’d stuck to my frugal, minimalistic ways, this never would’ve been an issue. I wouldn’t have both a good can opener and a bad can opener: I’d only have a can opener and never would have known what it’s like to open a can of beans in under 10 minutes.
10 minutes to open a can of beans? you might ask incredulously. Yes, that’s right. 10 minutes. But there was a serious sense of accomplishment when you were finally able to dump out a can’s contents and eat, especially after punching 548,033,236 holes in the lid and using the bottle opener portion to pry it off. It’s a miracle I still have all ten fingers.
It’s too late to go back though -the good can opener has ruined me forever. I’m too stubborn to buy a third can opener and probably too spoiled to use the bad can opener, so it looks like I’ll have to resort to pull-tab cans for the next seventy-five years.
Bad can opener.
Good can opener.
Also, today’s song is really good, so listen to it. Please.
Through My Headphone
*Lover Is Childlike -The Low Anthem